Man go's to doctors

[Rigsby]

a man goes to the doctors and says doctor every time i go for a shite it always comes out looking like chips , what is it ?
doctor says cut 3 inches off the bottom of your string vest !!

 

[Big Red]

Went to the doctor for my annual check up, all good, but he said……”Don’t eat anything fatty “ I said …..” What, bacon, chips buggers and stuff ?”. He said……..”No fatty, don’t eat anything!”

 

[Big Red]

I went to the doctors again last week, she is a new, young pretty lass. During my check up she said, “Mike you are going to have to stop masturbating” “why?” I asked……..”I am trying to examine you! “

 

[Big Red]

When to the doctor again this week, had the finger up the bum thing! When he had finished he walked out the door just as the nurse walked in, a lovely girl, but the first thing she said was………”Who was that bloke?”

 

[Big Red]

Due to my previous experience at the Doctor, I had to go back again for the finger up the bum thing again! This time he said “just stand up, put your hands on the bed and spread your feet apart” I dutifully did as requested, and all was going well until he put both hands on my shoulders!